Sweetness, I was only joking

I’m smiling

My eyes assure you it’s okay.

My lips tell you it’s fine.
I tell you I’m alright.

You really don’t know.

Pull back the curtains.

And the real me will show.
Shine the light on my eyes,

You’ll see they’re still sad.

Kiss my lips tenderly,

You’ll feel how broken they are

chapped.

Peel the fake skin off,

You’ll see the freshly swollen nostrils.

I didn’t mean to…

What have I done?

Who have I become?
And it becomes so intense.

The feeling.

The rush.

The moment is both a blur

And crystal clear.

Crystal…

No I’ll never do that.

Then again, never tasted so sweet.

I want more.

The feeling I get

Is both exhilarating

And horrifying.

What have I done?

WHO have I become?